Power-Sharing: Making Decisions with Our Young People

Parents, we don’t have to make every decision alone.

And honestly, that will be better for everyone in our family, especially our young ones. Involving young people in planning activities and decision-making within the home not only fosters their sense of responsibility and autonomy but also honors their personhood and strengthens family bonds.

Get started with shared decision-making by inviting your young ones to make age-appropriate choices. For younger children, offer simple options like selecting their outfits or choosing a bedtime story. As they grow, gradually expand the complexity of decisions, allowing them to contribute more significantly to family choices. At the root of independent meaningful learning is the belief that—with guidance and support—our young people have everything they need to make decisions about what they learn and how they learn.

Check out some more ways parents can include their young ones in decision-making: 

Deciding how we spend time together

Our young ones are full of great ideas—let’s hear them! Involve children in planning family outings or activities. Let them decide on the family’s next destination to go to, game to play, or movie to watch.

Planning our next meal

Spaghetti? Fried rice? Tacos? Encourage children to participate in planning and preparing meals, from snacks to dinnertime. Invite them to suggest their favorite dishes, tag along during the next grocery trip, and cook together in the kitchen.

Taking care of our home

Rather than demanding our young ones do chores they feel no ownership over, have a conversation about how they would like to help around the home. Identify age-appropriate contributions and allow them to have a say in choosing tasks that they feel comfortable with or interested in. This can look like picking up toys after they’re done playing with them, washing the dishes, or doing laundry together.

Setting family goals

Establish goals that the entire family can get behind, whether it’s saving for a vacation, learning a new dance choreography, or improving the garden. Work together to identify these collective goals then map out the steps to achieve them.

When we involve our young ones in making decisions that impact not only their lives but the entire family, we’re providing them the opportunity to develop a greater sense of responsibility, confidence, compassion, and equitability for themselves and those around them.